Sunday, September 20, 2009
Facts About Me
Haha I thought this was funny! Thanks to Pete Wentz for this.
I have a speech writer on staff. so everything i say every day is actually scripted. If i pause and look like im listening to you if you look very closely i have a tiny ear piece in and im just waiting on my next line. It doesnt work well if i get out of range thats why i say stupid stuff sometimes.
I came up with an idea for “hand de-sanitizer” for our government. so if our leaders were meeting with people they didnt like they could “germ em up”. i apparently brought this up to the wrong member of my city council.
Im so rich that unlike that ricky dude from silver spoons w/his min train. My kid will have a mini g5 that he gets in and flies all over the house.
I actually had such long legs as a child that my parents took me to a specialist in prague and had them shortened. so technically i am 6ft 1in.
Every “columbus day”. i recreate the voyage and sail from spain to an american indian reservation.
I once solved 99 problems in under a minute and in fact none of them were a bitch.
One time a cab driver told me that i was the most interesting person he had ever met. So interesting in fact that he not only said “hey this rides on me”. hes now my butler and driver and all i have to pay him is in interesting stories. i ran out of stories but hes old so ive just been telling him stuff from indiana jones for the past few months.
I invented the term “pardon my french” accidentally when i ordered in french at a joint in italy. quite embarrassing when i had to re-order in italian and then explain the whole ordeal in japanese to my friend.
Robert pattinson is based off me. no not the character from the movie. i mean him the actual human being. i dont know why people dont notice my sexy accent or height or perfect cheekbones. it keeps me up at night.
My cellphone isnt even connected to anything. anytime im talking on it i am just recording my voice so i can have a conversation with myself later.
I once blew a breathalyzer to perfect pi 3.1415926- the officer was so impressed that we had a drink and then i drove home to someone elses house.
“Yesterday I was backing out of my driveway, and a dog ran over me. He told me he was had insurance but when I called the number, it was for pizza hut. that jerk.”
“im not marcus welch, i just play him on tv.”
im not marcus welch, i just play him in real life.
I have a speech writer on staff. so everything i say every day is actually scripted. If i pause and look like im listening to you if you look very closely i have a tiny ear piece in and im just waiting on my next line. It doesnt work well if i get out of range thats why i say stupid stuff sometimes.
I came up with an idea for “hand de-sanitizer” for our government. so if our leaders were meeting with people they didnt like they could “germ em up”. i apparently brought this up to the wrong member of my city council.
Im so rich that unlike that ricky dude from silver spoons w/his min train. My kid will have a mini g5 that he gets in and flies all over the house.
I actually had such long legs as a child that my parents took me to a specialist in prague and had them shortened. so technically i am 6ft 1in.
Every “columbus day”. i recreate the voyage and sail from spain to an american indian reservation.
I once solved 99 problems in under a minute and in fact none of them were a bitch.
One time a cab driver told me that i was the most interesting person he had ever met. So interesting in fact that he not only said “hey this rides on me”. hes now my butler and driver and all i have to pay him is in interesting stories. i ran out of stories but hes old so ive just been telling him stuff from indiana jones for the past few months.
I invented the term “pardon my french” accidentally when i ordered in french at a joint in italy. quite embarrassing when i had to re-order in italian and then explain the whole ordeal in japanese to my friend.
Robert pattinson is based off me. no not the character from the movie. i mean him the actual human being. i dont know why people dont notice my sexy accent or height or perfect cheekbones. it keeps me up at night.
My cellphone isnt even connected to anything. anytime im talking on it i am just recording my voice so i can have a conversation with myself later.
I once blew a breathalyzer to perfect pi 3.1415926- the officer was so impressed that we had a drink and then i drove home to someone elses house.
“Yesterday I was backing out of my driveway, and a dog ran over me. He told me he was had insurance but when I called the number, it was for pizza hut. that jerk.”
“im not marcus welch, i just play him on tv.”
im not marcus welch, i just play him in real life.
Welcome!
Hey my name is Marcus and this is my new blog called Random Chaos Kids. I will keep it updated as often as I can! I'm a random guy and you never know what's gonna pop up on this blog haha. A little about me, I'm a magician/mentalist and Graphic designer/photographer. I love music and awesome new trends! I am my own person and you will have a great time on my blog haha (No guarantees promised) haha well bookmark this page and check it everyday for new updates of awesomeness!!!
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